NEW YEAR

Another year has gone, and it took all good and bad moments we lived. But, a new year is going to begin.

This event for some people is no more than a change of a calendar but, for others the New Year symbolizes the beginning of a better tomorrow, so that means we will have the possibility to fulfill some of our dreams, to accomplish some of our resolutions and also we will have the possibility to look for that something that could make us feel complete, and that’s for sure that during our search we will have love, happiness, sadness, encounters, absences, tears and laughs.

The most important here is; to continue trying to accomplish our goals and continue believing in our dreams.

Happy New Year!!!!

WHY MEN LOVE BITCHES

We all know the meaning of bitch, so you may think Why Men Love Bitches (por qué los hombres aman a las cabronas) is a derogative title, but is not, actually that title belongs to a book written by Sherry Argov, and it is a simple and humoristic woman’s guide to holding her own in a relationship, it is organized into ten chapters with 100 “Attraction Principals”.

This book isn’t about how to play or how to manipulate someone; it is about the attitude girls should have so as to stop being a nice girl and then become a new and improve bitch.

According to Sherry there are two kind of girls the ones that are TOO nice and bitches, now you may wonder, how can I know if I am a nice girl or a bitch?

Let’s meet the nice girl…..

I guess everybody knows a nice girl, she is the kind woman who will overcompensate, giving everything to a man, without him having to invest much in the relationship, also she is the woman who gives blindly because she wants more of her attentions to be reciprocated and she is the woman who goes along with what she thinks her man will like or want, so that means she is too willing to accommodate and please a man, because she thinks that’s the best way to bring his love, but at the end that attitude leads a man to see her like a desperate or like a needy woman.

So at the end a nice girl will start feeling miserable and will start complaining about her relationship but she won’t say a peep and she will want to talk about the situation they are living without having the answer she was expecting.

Now let’s meet a bitch

At the beginning of chapter ten Sherry gives a new definition of the term bitch.

A bitch is a woman who won’t bang her head against the wall obsessing over someone else’s opinion – be it a man or anyone else in her life. She understands that if someone does not approve of her, it’s just one person’s opinion; therefore, it’s of no real importance. She doesn’t try to live up to anyone else’s standards – only her own.

In other words a bitch is the kind of girl who keeps her independency, who doesn’t chases a man, who has some mystery, a girl who doesn’t allow a man to see her having a bad moment, a girl who has the control of her time and feelings. And if she complains about something or someone, she will say plenty of peeps and if she sees the relationship is not worthwhile she will say no more.

So, as you can see the main difference between a nice girl and a bitch is the attitude each one has.

I want to finish this entry saying:

“Just remember: is not about a man, is your life and it has a big value so as to be wasted. Do things only if you see they are convenient for you, especially about your options and the one you let be close to you. It will give you better utility, especially on dignity department. So never ask for affection, if he does not correspond you, stop giving him affection and stop insisting”.

Post Script

I don’t want to sound like a feminist person, but is a nice feeling to be a bitch; ’cause that means you are a Babe In Total Control of Herself.

UPDATE

When I started reading this book I was slightly skeptical, because I didn’t have idea what I was going to find, but little by little it was calling my attention ’cause it has some helpful advices, but some others are not really good at all. Actually, I’m not saying to apply the whole book on your personal life, ’cause that will be kind of silly. Since my point of view there should be a balance between being a nice girl and a bitch.

WHAT MAKES....?

During life, love could leave a big mark in memories, in hopes, in feelings.

I was remembering that some months ago, a girl was thinking “This isn't a goodbye, even as I watch him leave, this isn't a goodbye”, and she was not able to forget and his absences was hurting her a lot. For her not only days but also nights were so long, because she was not able to be close to him and due to that she was feeling her soul so sad and so cold. She was trying to hide with a smile the way she was feeling, but I’m sure when no one could see her, tears were always filling her eyes.

After that, I started wondering, what makes a person so right? And how and when do you decide he is the dream that you seek?

DO NOT....

During my personal and professional life, I have been having successes, but also I have found adversities, and of course they make me feel a little bit frustrated but, precisely those obstacles and mistakes are the ones who make me learn and the ones who make me know I have a new beginning and a reason to start something new, also are the ones who make me think that perhaps my “destiny” has a better idea for me and that I should keep on trying.

ALTHOUGH..

Although we haven’t been in touch for a while and everything has finished between us, I still remember how it feels to be with you, ’cause my mind has kept all that happiness I used to feel any time I was close to you, and all those emotions my body used to feel any time you touched me, any time you kissed me, any time you held me and any time you loved me.

Now, those days are gone and I know there are no roads to take so as to turn back time. But I wish I could do it, so that I can be one more time right beside you.

POSSIBLE OR IMPOSSIBLE

The internet has been a revolutionary tool that has changed our lives in a big way, ’cause we can use it, either at home for personal or at work for professional usages. Is quite normal that many people spend part of their day on internet, and they use this kind of medium to get any kind of information. That’s for sure whatever you are looking for you will find it. So, is it possible to find your soul mate and true love in cyberspace?

I think is possible, but I bet is a challenge to do it. I mean you can talk with different kind of people and you can start feeling attracted to a person just by his way of writing, thinking or speaking and I guess that is good beginning. So next step will be to see how he looks like, so you know the person by either cam or picture and perhaps at the same time you can be listening to his voice and all those factors may let you think you will like to know him. So after being talking for a while both may decide is time to know each other, so you have a date.

Since my point of view that will be the hardest part, first ’cause for some people the computer makes them have more self confidence, and in the other hand what if he is not what you expected or what if you don’t feel that chemical or sexual attraction. I mean, things may change.

Anyways, I think to date someone you know in the internet is a challenge, and I guess it will be a good experience. So if you are looking for someone in cyberspace keep on that, who knows probably you, will find your true love.

Possible or impossible, what do you think about it?

I STILL

Who are you now?
are you still the same,
Or did you change somehow?
What do you do?
At this very moment, when I think of you
and when I’m looking back
How we were young and stupid.
Do you remember that?
I Can’t deny it
Just can’t let you go.

Now look at me
Instead of moving on, I refuse to see
That I’m keep coming back
And I’m stuck in a moment
That wasn’t meant to last.

I tried to fight it
Can’t deny it
You don’t even know that
I still need you
I still care about you
Though everything’s been said and done
I still feel you
Like I’m right beside you
But still no word from you.

This lyrics made me remember that I’ve been on that situation. Now I´m wondering If I still.

WHAT MAKES YOU GET ANNOYED?

Even if we are not the kind of person who gets angry so easily, that’s for sure there are some factors that can make us feel upset.

In my case I don’t like when people change plans without letting you know but, sometimes I can stand it.

What really drives crazy is when someone wants to bother my family, also when people want to play with my life and time, or when people have a silly or should I say an stupid position like silence and/or indifference, despite they know there is something wrong and things ain’t the same in your friendship or relationship. I mean, at least for me is better to be honest and say the truth.

And there are some other factors that can make feel upset like: discrimination or when people take advantage of their social, cultural and economical position.

Now tell me, what makes you get annoyed?

MEN & FEELINGS

I think we as women have complain at least one time about men feelings, because sometimes we don’t know if we have a boyfriend or a piece of ice close to us. And we may think do men have feelings? If they do, why don’t they communicate enough? And, why don’t they express their feelings and thoughts?.

Is more than sure that men have feelings, but they do not express them so easy because since they were little kids they haven been “programming” so as to be strong, and for some men to talk about feelings is a sign of weakness.

We girls have to understand that men are suppose to be "machos", that’s why they lack the skills to express their feelings, but I guess on a relationship men will gain the capacity to express their thoughts as soon as they feel more comfortable so as to open their "hearts" because little by little they will see we are not going to laugh of their feelings and we are not going to tell nobody about them.

Anyways, men show what they feel on a different way so we should pay attention on their actions and on their way of being because it might express in a better way what they feel for us.

As Benjamin Franklin said "WELL DONE IS BETTER THAN WELL SAID."

SOMETIMES....

Since you have gone without saying good bye seems like everything is wrong, and somehow that action makes me feel I have lost much more than pride.

That’s why sometimes I want to forget that I knew you and that you were part of my life, that you made me believe and dream again, that you changed my life and that you touched my heart. Even sometimes I want to forget that I loved, that I shared your dreams and that I shared your bed, but I guess is not possible at all because memories are always there to stay.

P.S. Holy love, you make us feel happy and sad, you makes us dream, miss and cry. But what we will be without you?

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

Is that really important to be a good looking person so as to be able to catch someone’s eye?

I will be lying if I say “the way of looking is not important” because is not true at all, actually is the first thing that makes us feel attracted to a person. But as soon as we start spending time with a buy or a girl the physical appearance will be located on a second place because we will find another qualities like their attitude, their intelligence, their goals, their personality, their feelings, their thoughts, etc.

So after being thinking about a question related with this topic I can say that I really don’t see any problem to be attracted to a person that is not pretty good looking because at the end a person is define by their inners and not by their beauty.

So date the person you want to know, the person you want to be with, just take into consideration what is more important for you and what makes you feel more comfortable.

I want to finish this post writing something that I read long time ago “Only brave and big hearts will be able to see and will be able to understand that beauty is not in the face, beauty is a light in the heart”.

HOW CAN YOU MEND A BROKEN HEART?

I´m sure a lot of people had heard that question at least one time, and I´m sure you had heard different suggestions about the way you can mend it. I know sometimes is really difficult to give a good answer because people feel in a different way and besides that, you don´t know how big is the hurt people have on their hearts.

Today on a TV program I heard an intelligent and a true answer: "You can not say that a heart is broken because you are alive. But you can find confused hearts, afraid hearts, wistful hearts and wounded hearts, in those cases time will be the most important in helping hearts to feel much better".

It does not matter how big was the wound in your heart, you should give you the oportunity to love and to live again.

MUSIC

Music is an art converted in aesthetic experiences that can express feelings, circumstances, thoughts or ideas.

Music is one of the great pleasures that can exist, is incredible the effects that a good lyrics, music or interpretation can cause, not only in events of daily life but also in memories that we have kept in our mind.

Yesterday I listened to several songs I haven´t heard in a while, and it was great to bring back memories of love, lack of affection, happiness and melancholy I have lived. Also I remembered some singers they used to make me drool. Even I have to confess that although some years have passed, certain green eyes continue making me sigh.

Definitive, I love music.

COMMENTS

This time I want to talk about two interesting blogs I found:

The first one is called "De perfumes..." and I agree with the person who wrote that blog because in my case a nice smell has a big impact on me, for example I remember that couple weeks ago I was in the subway and suddenly I perceived the smell of my favorite male perfume the which one that makes me remember a guy, and despite the subway was crowded it was incredible that my nose could identify so easy the owner of that smell.

The second blog is called: "De lo romántico a la razón", this one talks about human odor and it effects on choosing a couple, and it was really incredible to find that if you have a genetic compatibility with a person the odor will be unpleasant for you and he says the reason of this effect is that you look for a person with a different genetic immunity.

If you have some time, you should read both blogs, because they are really interesting.

I´m kind of new on this things so if you want to read the complete blogs here you can find them:
http://vidaenfacil.blogspot.com/
http://ozhomatli-pachon.blogspot.com/

CHILDREN

Yesterday after a stressful day, a three years old girl with her tenderness and her ideas made feel really better.

I started thinking that despite children are small and defenseless they have a lot of wisdom, because they make you understand in thousand forms that there are so many things to be happy with. Also I saw that children have a big capacity to love and with their innocent look they are able to transmit all happiness, honesty and sincerity they keep on their heart.

I think that the most important lesson they can give us is that is possible to live without hatred and resentment.

TO START AGAIN

Sometimes we believe that we have found the right person, but unfortunately the life makes you see that is not true and you have to start again. This time I want to find a person who doesn’t laugh and who doesn´t show indiference to my feelings, a person who doesn´t see tenderness like a weakness, a person who doesn’t feel fear to love, a person who can not be selfish, a person who can define what he wants and what he feels, a person who has the worth to say “I love you” or “I miss you”, mainly I’m looking for a person who is looking for me in the way I am.

YOU LEARN

After a while, you learn the subtle diference between holding a hand and chaining a soul.

You learn that love doesn’t mean sex, and that a company doesn’t mean security. And you begin to learn. That kisses are not contracts and presents are not promises and you begin to accept your defeats with head high and with eyes open.

And you learn to build all your roads of today, because tomorrow´s ground is to uncertain for plans, and futures have a way of falling down in pieces. After a while your learn that even sunshine burns if you get to much.

You plant your own garden and you decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for some one to bring you flowers. And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong and that you really have a worth, and you learn and learn.

With time you learn that to be with some one who offers you a good future, means that sooner or later you will want to go back to your past. With time you understand that only who is able to love you with your defects and without trying to change you, will be able to give you all the happiness you wish.

With time you find out that if you are at the side of that person just so as to accompany your loneliness, irremediably you will finish hoping not to see him/her again. With time you understand that true friends are counted, and who doesn´t fight for them sooner or later will see himself surrounded by false friends.

With time also you learn that words said in a moment of anger will continue hurting the one you hurt during all his/her life. With time you learn that to say I´m sorry anybody does it, but to forgive is only done by great souls.

With time you figure out that although you are happy with your friends, someday you will cry for those ones you let go. With time you figure out that every experience you have lived is unique.

With time you figure out that the person who humiliates and despises to a human being, sooner or later he/she will suffer the same humiliations or scorns multiplied by two. With time you figure out that to hurry or to force things to happen, will cause that at the end they were not as you expected.

With time you figure out that in reality the future was not the best, if not the instant moment you were living. With time you will see that although you are happy with the ones you have at your side, you will miss the ones that yesterday were with you, but they have gone.

With time you will learn that try to forgive or to ask for forgiveness, say that you love, say that you miss, say that you need, say that you want to be a friend, infront of a tomb, has no sense.

But unfortunately, only with time.

"Written by Jorge Luis Borges"